Three Generations to Greatness

"It's one generation from a pickaxe to a putter. And the next generation from a tuxedo to a tramp." - Will Rogers


Yesterday's blog post about motivating children reminded me of what is considered the ways to greatness for classical pianists. It is called, Three Generations to Greatness. It is what the classical music world considers the minimum for a pianist to be in order to become truly great. Basically; it takes three generations of family effort and diligence to create one piano child prodigy. 


I thought that this story might be useful to those of us who sometimes wonder why they are on this earth and what their purpose is.


I say this because, I, too, sometimes wonder what the legacy is that I will leave on this planet after I die. I have begun to have these thoughts because of the recent death of my own father. Of course, I loved my mother and father and miss them so... But what was their legacy?


Take my father for example, his legacy is much different than my mother's because things changed greatly for our family after my mom's death. Our family fell apart. What does that make my dad's legacy?


A former marine. Three sons who do not speak to each other. Some very old photos of his mom and family and a marine dress uniform that he left to me to care for as he said he wasn't sure that my brothers would do so properly.


Is that all? I'm sure that's all. Unfortunately. And, when you stop to think about it, in the overall picture of things, that's just about all for 99.99999999999% of all the world's people.


In 2003, I started writing for blogs. In 2005, I wrote my first and only book. Why did I write these books? Well, I wanted to leave a legacy... Something to be remembered by. I want to write another book soon too. Oh, and I want to do oil painting again...


Alas...


I look at the old and tattered photos that my father gave me of his dear mother. Is this her legacy?


The other day, I went to meet a friend named Kieruto Duits who runs a business called "Old Photos of Japan." There Kieruto takes old photos of the people and places of old Japan and lovingly immortalizes them for future use. This seems a wonderful way to leave a legacy. Guys like Kieruto, I know, will take care of my old photos of my mother taken before the war. I am going to give mine to him. I am also going to give him some important family photos of Japanese soldiers before WWII.


But I digress...


Most of us haven't an very old photos or we haven't written a book (my book is terrible and a waste!) neither do most of us paint like Picasso or sing like the Beatles nor compose like Mozart....


But! Aha! There is a key there! Mozart! Music!... Maybe our legacy is not in and of ourselves, perhaps our legacy is in our children! The title of this post is "Three Generations to Greatness." It is true. "Three Generations to Greatness" is what is said it takes, in the world of classical music, for a child to become a great pianist.


Let me explain how, what you do today, can lead to greatness someday using the example of "Three Generations to Greatness." First off, more detail as to what exactly is the three generations.


Here's the story: It is said that it requires three generations of effort and parenting to build a piano genius. The typical story goes like this:


Grandfather works hard as a day laborer. He struggles and saves. He builds a good business. He doesn't want his children to struggle and suffer as he did. He wants them to become doctors or lawyers. He wants them to study culture and art. He makes the children take piano lessons. He works hard and sends them to good universities. 


The children never become good pianists. Why? Because, after lessons, when they are home, there is no one to play and practice with. After all, we all know that you become proficient or great when you practice and hone your craft with someone who knows that craft.


Later, the children grow up. They become doctors or lawyers. They want their children to have the same or better. They want their children (the grandchildren) to study culture and art. They make the children take piano lessons. They work hard to send their children to good universities. 


Same as grandfather, right? Wrong. Now, these grandchildren, when they come home from piano practice (once a week for one hour) they have someone who knows how to play and practice. They have someone at home whom they can enjoy the piano with.


If that someone is their mother and she is working at home, then these children have a massive head-start on others who have no one to practice or play with.


This is why, say traditional musicians, such as American country or Jazz musicians, are thought to be so great: They start practicing with grandpa when they were little kids. That's why they are so proficient and such awesome musicians when they are 25-years-old! 


The moral of the story? Even though what you do now may not seem, at first, to be any sort of creation of a legacy, remember that what you teach your children, they will teach theirs. 


Treat your children with respect. Learn what motivates them. Help them flourish and bloom. Create your legacy.

The Millionaire Businessman's Way of Motivating Children (and the Child Inside All of Us!)

Motivate your children!

What child doesn't want to feel like a winner?

What adult doesn't have a child inside?

Yesterday's post about being a good salesman and selling by taking the time to find out what people want and thereby motivating them to talk to you and buy your services. In that post: Good Salesmen Do Not Sell Their Product... They Sell Solutions For Customer's Problems please refer to:

Whether with an introduction or none, the good salesman will always be able to open doors and start conversations when their approach is totally geared upon providing a solution to the prospective customers needs.

The client is not interested in what you want to sell. The client is only interested in finding a solution to their problem.

If you can be a part of that solution, you will be a great salesman and make big money. So remember to always think of your prospective customer needs first. Never meet a new client and start discussing your product. Always start discussions on their problems and needs. Sell people what they want to buy. Sell them a solution to their problems.

Marc Sheffner, a great blogger and teacher, wrote to me and said: 

Seriously, tho, tomorrow morning I have this particularly difficult class of young people. Reading your post, I wonder if I have not focused a little too much on what I want them to buy, and assumed that what I'm selling is (of course) a solution for them, one that they want (otherwise they wouldn't be in my class, right?).

Perhaps so, Marc. May I also recommend to you (everybody!), once again, to read "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnagie? Please don't take my rcommendation as my foolishly thinking I am wise enough to give any sort of advice to anyone... Trust that I have and need to continually read this book. In fact, I even bought this book for someone who is much smarter than me... My wife! And I gave it to her just a few weeks ago! (OK... Maybe she ain't all that smart. After all, she married me, right? Chuckle!) 

Why did I buy this book for my wife? Well, let me give you some back ground. Take a moment to allow me to indulge in what we called in Japan "馬鹿親" Baka Oya (Stupid parents). I am a baka oya. Baka oya are parents who like to brag about their kids too much. So, I guess that means, that all parents are stupid because what parent doesn't want to brag about their kids?

My son plays classical piano. He got a late start and started at 5. (Trust me folks, for the classical piano world, that's a late start). Even though he started late, last year, he won a prestigeous award from the Japan National Piano Teacher's and Instructor's Association. That award put him in the top 20 seven to nine year old piano students in the entire country. We were, of course, so proud! 

My son practices, and has always practiced with his mom at least one hour a day, everyday, seven-days-a-week, 365 days a year. Sometimes they practice twice a day for an hour or two hours!) No misses. He does this religiously. Every day. Over and over. There's no stopping.

Now, consider, my friends, what it takes to get a 5 ~ 7-year-old to sit down at a piano and practice hard everyday? Most parents have a hard time getting their children to sit down and be quiet for five minutes! How does one motivate a small child to do something like this? Surely, we all know that yelling and threats do not work. There must be a secret to motivating children. 

My wife has been excellent at it!

Recently, though, there's been a trouble a brewing! At least twice, after piano practice with his regular teacher, my wife complained that he figeted and didn't pay attention. On three occassions, recently at home or during practice, either he came down crying or my wife came downstairs and angrily flopped on the sofa in total frustration.

The other day, when this happened for the second time, I asked my wife, "What's wrong?"

She then started complaining and reciting again the troubles I just listed. Ironically, I had been rereading "How to Win Friends and Influence People"... In one chapter in the book, Carnagie refers to getting children to do something they don't want to do. In that chapter he speaks of finding the child's motivation and finding a way to spark that.

Carnagie recalls an interesting story in the book. A woman complained to Carnagie that her sons at college would never write back to her no matter what she did. She had tried pleading and begging, even threats didn't work. Carnagie bet her that he could get the sons to write back to him immediately. 

In Carnagie's letters to the sons (I seem to remember that the boys were his nephews) he wrote something like, "I am proud to hear that you are doing well in college. Please find, enclosed in this letter, a check for $10 to spend on whatever you wish." He then intentionally forgot to enclose the check. Within a few days, both boys had written back "Thank you" notes and politely mentioned that there was no check.

Talk about finding a college student's motivation!

I ordered the book, in Japanese, for my wife. When it arrived, I gave it to her. At first, she seemed insulted. She said,

"I read this book long ago! I know all about it."

Yes. I was sure she has. It would have taken someone quite versed in this knowledge to have gotten a 5-year-old to sit down at a piano for an hour a day - and have that child actually enjoy it! I have read this book too. From reading it, I learned a thing about how to respond to a defensive comment like this one from my wife. I politely and calmly responded.

"Yes. I figured you already know everything in this book. But, since we have been having a small bit of trouble with our son's discipline recently, I reread the book and thought, perhaps, you'd enjoy reading it again too. I thought, perhaps, that maybe we were doing something differently than we were doing before and that, if we thought about it, perhaps we could do things a little bit better."

That totally disarmed her and with a kiss on the cheek, I went off to work. 

A few days later, I received an unexpected email from my wife. It said,

"Mike,

I read the book. I know almost everything in it as I have read it before. But sometimes, I see that I have been forgetting to do things this way. This book is so very useful to me. Thank you."

Thank god I reread that book. Had I not, my wife and I might have gotten into a fight about the way things were heading. If I hadn't applied what I learned in that book, here's what probably would have happened:

1) Our son would still not be practicing diligently  

2) My wife would be getting angry and frustrated

3) Piano practice would have started turning into a very unpleasant experience for all involved (which might end any future piano dreams)

4) I might get angry at my son and shout at him

5) I might have gotten frustrated with the entire situation and my wife and I would get into fights

6) Nothing positive would have been accomplished.

But, as it turned out, I kindly and politely gave the book to my wife with the words, "Perhaps we could do things a little bit better." Here's what happened:

1) My wife and I have a closer relationship and understanding

2) My wife was reminded of the magic she used to get her son to practice diligently and seriously before

3) Practice has been going well

4) My son is happy because, instead of anger, he gets praise

5) Only positive things have been accomplished.

What a relief. And it's all so simple.

I highly recommend "How to Win Friend's and Influence People" by Dale Carnagie whether you are dealing with clients or staff or even your own kids... Because, after all, we all ARE children inside.

Learn to motivate that child and you will prosper! Learn to motivate that child who lives in all of us and you will be extremely successful! 

NOTE: My son's most popular video on Youtube has over 7,000 views! It was made when he was only six! See it here: 

children, coworkers, happy family, positve, practice, sales, worker, Dale Carnagie, happy, business, How to Win Friend's and Influence People, motivate, motivation, piano, 

Yumi Okazaki Charity Concert for Smile Support Scholarship featuring Miki Asakura

You’re cordially invited to a multiple award winning pianist Yumi Okazaki’s charity concert on June 18th (Saturday) 2011 at the Office Sekkei Hall, conveniently located on the 34th floor of Izumi Garden Tower, Roppongi. 

Yumi Okazaki

Yumi will perform such popular numbers such as Fur Elise (Beethoven), Traumerei (R.A.Schumann), La Campanella (Liszt), Moonlight (Debussy), and more. Also, renowned singer Miki Asakura will also perform.

インタビュー 岡崎ゆみ×ロゼワイン

The tickets are on sale for ¥3,500 yen at the door which is equivalent to one English/Japanese dictionary. All proceeds will be donated to schools in the Tohoku region to support children’s education. The doors will open at 13:15 on June 18th; the performance will start at 14:00. 


For more information on how to buy tickets click here: http://www.wazoo.jp/open/tresinternational/

Miki Asakura

「岡崎ゆみチャリティコンサート」SMILE SUPPORT SCHOLARSHIP CONCERT

 泉ガーデン34階にある天空のコンサートホールでピアニスト岡崎ゆみ先生をお招きしクラシックコンサート。東京を一望できるガラス張りのコンサートホールで初夏の午後をゆったりと過ごしませんか？

ゆみさんのコンサートの特長は曲の合間に入る軽妙なトーク。大作曲家リストやショパンの知られざるエピソードなどを聞けば今までよく知っていた曲がまるで違った調べとなって心に響きます。

スペシャルゲストとして麻倉未稀さんのご出演も決定！

ぜひご家族のみなさまお誘いあわせのうえいらしてください。

スパークリングワインやソフトドリンクの販売コーナーもございます。

（今回の参加費はおひとり分＝辞書一冊分＝3500円です

　今回も参加費は全額寄付とさせていただきます。）

Link. http://www.tres2003.com/seminar.html

Tickets? Click here